Stop waiting. Start creating...

When I first got ill I waited to my discover mystery illness, I waited to get better and I waited to get back to my life. I put my life on 'hold'. I just existed and kept my face firmly turned back to the past, waiting to return. I had always had major health problems that I had overcome before, so why not now? 

After a diagnosis, I wasn't much wiser because so little was known, no one could give me anything but well meant suggestions and I knew no one with a chronic illness, Fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue or anything similar. There was no internet or groups to ask. The doctor said it was permanent though.

I didn't believe him. I still waited through another two years of trying to recover before I realised that I wasn't going to be able to return to 'normal programming'. I finally resigned from my job. I kept hoping for recovery, but I stopped waiting for it. I had to live!

It is important to differentiate between hope and not waiting. Hope means you believe that in the future things will change or improve. Waiting means you stop living the life you have now on the dream that you can return to the past. You can't return; that's why it's called the past.  

You CAN go forward. When you stop waiting and realise that today IS your life, you change your focus. You take your life off pause and starting living it. If you aren't facing the future, you aren't going anywhere. 

Start creating your life! Not waiting doesn't mean you give up hopes and dreams, just the opposite! It means taking a step forward. It means saying "Yes!" instead of  'Not yet'. A life on pause is a pretty boring thing: no sound, no picture, static. Don't wait, just watching your life pass by, it's happening now! 

Take it off pause and play! 

See the flowers...

Do not let what you cannot do interfere 

with what you can do.

 ~John Wooden

When I decided to do what I could and enjoy that, it made a difference in my life, in the quality and the happiness. Yes, I still get frustrated but by concentrating on the good things and noticing them I have more happiness. 

Not being able to do things IS frustrating. It can make you angry or depressed. If you concentrate on what you lack, your failures or faults and you criticise yourself you feel worse. At this point you cannot have a good day and nothing will go right! If you only look for the negative you are going to find it. You will see every tiny unhappy thing because that is what you are focused on. It's like being in a field of wild flowers and only seeing the weeds. Do you really want to fill your life with that? 

But what if you stop and look at everything you CAN do, all the things you know and all the abilities you take for granted? Think of all your good points and successes. Not only will you appreciate yourself more, you will be inspired to learn or experience MORE things. You will look for the good things, the possibilities, the small positive things in your day that before you missed because your head was too full of the negative.

The weird thing is sometimes I get so sick I can't do anything at all really and that MAKES me appreciate what I can do, even if it is small. There are many amazing things you can do, that you know or have experienced. Inside you are skills and abilities, thoughts and humour, love and life. Don't waste it. You are amazing. You have so much to offer. 

Yes, there are weeds, but see the flowers? They are dancing in the breeze. 

Hope you see flowers today,
Jane
aka Queen Babs

Do you have a goal?

Do you have a goal? 

“Who you were, who you are and who you will be are three different people.”

I always thought I'd get married and have children and teach school or something like that. I didn't plan on getting ill or having traumatic things happen - who does? I think by my late 30s I had decided to just grow old without a partner with friends and family around me. ❤️ 

I never thought my life would have such twists and turns and adventure and pain and demands on my strength. If nothing bad had happened to me I don't think I would have understood or appreciated as much. Or that this would allow me to learn and grow and develop so that I realise there is so very much more to do in my life. Sometimes I feel like I am just beginning. ❤️ 

I have no idea where life will take me next, but it's exciting and scary all at the same time. I have no grand plans for the future just - 

1. Keep working on my health 

2. Live lovingly with my husband Martin 

3. Be creative 

4. Take opportunities that arise if I want to. 

5. Practise kindness and compassion. ❤️ 

Goals don't have to be big and grand, they just help you focus on what is important to you. Goals change with us as we change. Surviving each day IS a goal, but when you can raise your head and start looking up, think about what you might like to do. Small, short term goals are good for many of us.

Hang in there,

Jane